Friday, June 17, 2005


(darn, now I have that Cranberries song stuck in my head)

Last night, one of Dad's cousins drove upstate to see us; he's a night owl, so whenever he comes here, he shows up late in the evening, and used to stay until 3 AM or so, and then drive back home. This morning he left about one-thirty, but I had to get up at a quarter after five (AM AM AM), so that was plenty late for me. I'm going to go back to bed in a little bit, just because I have to drive Dad somewhere (2 hrs each way) this afternoon, and I want to be alert. :)

Except for the whole getting up after not having enough sleep, I liked being up that early. We drove down deserted country roads, dew on the alfalfa fields sparkling in the sun; fluffy cloud remnants still hung in the valleys. I LOVE it -- it's like the clouds like to come down and nestle close to the land during the night (and "The stars are God's daisy chain," I know, I know, leave me alone). It's very fairy-taleish and magical, and it always makes my imagination even more vivid.

Day before yesterday, I got an invitation to a bridal shower for Erica, who was one of my friends when we were growing up. She's the second one of my friends to get married in the past 8 months; it's so strange, sometimes, to think that we're that old.


I want to get married. I only know one person I would even consider marrying (and by "consider, " I mean "YESSSSS! When? This afternoon? I'LL BE READY!"), and I haven't seen him since last year. I'm done dating stupid guys -- or, rather, stupidly dating [stupid] guys; I'm tired of it. What I really want to do is not date around, but wait until the guy who's interested in me is the right kind of guy. Why waste my time and energy and affection on someone who isn't worth it and/or isn't in it for the right reasons anyway? Bah.

Why do I want to get married? Some things that are attractive to me are the stability, the security, being able to always be with the person I like the best out of the whole world, the person I love deeply, and who kind of likes me (just checking -- are you still awake? heh ;) . ...those are just a couple things on my leeeengthy list...

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