Sunday, June 19, 2005

I WILL be fine.

Balancing on the edge of the sun-dappled deck before I hurtled my body into the sunlight to snare some Vitamin D, I realized I can be happy about tolerate, maybe even enjoy a little (let's not push it) today (even though this morning, I wished I could sleep through the whole day and wake up tomorrow not feeling so sick).

Why?

Because I hung onto a pair of jeans that are now a size or two too big for me, and I can pull them off without undoing the snaps and buttons. They're perfect for today, when I feel sick and hungover and need a pick-me-up in the vanity department -- having to continually hike up my pants is a good little boost.

Because I don't have any classes this summer that I have to do homework for. I don't have to get up early every weekday morning and sit through classes I don't particularly like. Access to the Internet without having to research for a paper or feel guilty about using the computer for means other than schoolwork.

Because I'm proud of myself for treadmilling this morning before breakfast.

Because I can play around with my watercolours and my journal.

Because we have snails in our garden pond (and tree frogs who congregate there every night, and a huge fuzzy spider who I'm convinced is hiding out somewhere in the vicinity of the bench, which is why I haven't sat there for five days and am constantly on the lookout whenever I venture out by the pond.

Because I have a crazy mom who brought the accordion upstairs and was playing in the hallway outside my room this morning.

Because even though the sun's out and it's hot HOT HOT, there's a wonderful breeze, and it makes the leaf shadows dance around on the deck.

Because our rosebushes are in bloom. When we moved here, there was a huge woodpile north of the house. After we cleared it, rosebushes sprouted up, and they have gradually taken over the whole garden (again) -- they're the best-smelling, loveliest roses.

Because in a week and a half, I'll be catsitting, and will finally have something done to this craaazy hair.

Because if my cousin can take a hint, this summer (and fall and winter and spring and summer...) could be really interesting and fun.

Because my Dad is alive and isn't dizzy anymore.

Because I got to see two of my favourite people yesterday. :)

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