Wednesday, May 18, 2005

chaos

I hate nights like tonight. There are some times when it seems that there are so many ideas bouncing around in the confines of my skull, that I can't pin just one down and concentrate on it -- the others are all so distracting. I need to finish reading a book and get some idea of what I'll say on the essay questions for my native american history class FINAL tomorrow morning, but string theory, quantum mechanics, astronomy, stargazing, admiration, and old journal entries I found - are crowding my mind. It's like stupid static on AM stations -- annoying and interfering, but you just can't tune it out.

Some part of it (okay, a huge part) has to do with the fact that I moved all my things home last weekend and spend a goodish chunk of the last couple of days with my best friend, and lots of time at my old campus. That campus is one of the only places on Earth where I feel comfortable and safe, where my body actually relaxes.

But the other part has to do with the fact that I'm just so ready for school to be finished. I studied my butt off, got straight A's, and I'm just so tired. I didn't come back to school until this afternoon, and I think if I'd come back on sunday evening, as usual, I wouldn't be having this problem to this extent. I got out of the school mode, I think.

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