Seasons 1 & 2

K: "So Newman called me again last night at three in the morning saying he was going up to the roof to kill himself."
J: "So what did you tell him?"
K: "I said, 'Jump!'"

When I move away and have a pet, I will name him "Kramer." And he will be my Kramer.

I messed with my hair with scissors again. Everytime I think about it, it sounds like a good idea, until I actually do it. I just get an itching for the feeling of cutting my hair sometimes. I can't believe this. What am I, FOUR?

I watched almost all of SNL last night, and enjoyed it so much -- though it isn't as great without Jimmy Fallon, and why do people keep talking about Lindsey Lohan's boobs? Are they really that interesting? I don't think so...but maybe that's just me.