On the Art of Being Selfish

On the Art of Being Selfish*

When the wedding planning began, months ago, I tried to be fair and open, taking everyone's suggestions, everyone's advice.

Because of my sweet openmindedness, I have been utterly overwhelmed**. I have received advice from people at the post office, from people I don't know, from friends of friends, from people telling me about a mother's aunt's friend's sister (you think I'm joking? I'm perfectly serious). And last night, when I was at the onset of yet another "WHAT SHOULD I DO" migraine, I suddenly realized:

I've had it. I refuse. I will no longer put myself in this position; I've had enough with being so open and accepting.

I can't please everyone; if I tried, I'd end up with a wedding that is nothing that I wanted, but a huge, nonsensical mix of ideas and plans. And I realized that that's not what I want. I'm finally putting my foot down, finally planning it the way John and I want it.

I've learned a few things in the past 15 hours, since that Earth-shattering revelation, particularly that this art, the art of Being Obstinate and Selfish, has a few requirements:

a) standing your ground
b) being prepared for other people being upset
c) the consumption of multiple double-chocolate fudge brownie cupcakes




* is it really selfishness when it's our own wedding?
** no offense to the advice-givers; I received a lot of good advice, as well; but there is a point at which any other advice is overwhelming.